I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. It was 6am. I rolled out, trudged down the stairs, and started making espresso. I’d had a rough night of restless legs and a restless mind, which had me falling asleep somewhere between one and two in the morning. I wasn’t happy. In that moment, a strong latte was my only hope.
Espresso made. Trudged back up the stairs and into my office, where I flopped down and put my attention on my next priority, my gratitude journal. Each morning, I write down three things I’m currently grateful for and then focus on them for a few minutes. Today, this was the last thing I felt like doing but, like magic, three things appeared from the tip of my pen looking like this:
My Free Will
Love in my Life
“My Free Will.” A little reminder that I am responsible for my actions and my attitude, especially when I’m feeling like a sleepless grumpy-butt.
My commitment (to myself) to get up at 6am came directly out of “My Free Will” to start my day with some self-care (Let’s have a little self-accountability here, Karen!🙂).
No one is making me get up at 6am. I am choosing to do so.
So, more often than I like, I have sleepless nights. I can’t control those nights. What I can control is how I’m going to respond to a sleepless night. I can react and take my victimhood out on others…essentially punishing them for my circumstances. Or I can take accountability for and be responsible for my attitude and behavior and not make others responsible for my tired grumpy-butt.
I try to start my day on the right foot and yes, that includes choosing to participate in a caffeine addiction🙂. It also includes gratitude journaling, meditating, stretching, writing, and connecting with myself. This reminds me why I chose to start waking up earlier…to have the time to start my day in self-care so that I choose me first and don’t make you responsible for my attitude, my lack of sleep, my circumstances.
I can choose to remain a victim to last night and allow it to continue victimizing my day and this moment. Or I can choose to find joy, grace and happiness right here.
I can choose to be grateful that I was gifted a restless night of sleep, in a safe home and a comfortable bed, with love surrounding me, and the universe supporting me.
Thankfully today, I choose the latter. I fully understand that I am responsible to choose to BE my best self. “My Free Will” gives me that choice. Your Free Will gives you the same.
And then tonight, I’ll sleep like a baby (You hear me, Universe?!?) and be curious about what tomorrow will bring. I’ll attempt to be Pope Francis-like and, “await the surprise of each new day.”
- How do you get yourself out of a funk when it appears? How do you shift? Do you find that you get wrapped up in mis-directed anger toward others? Or do you find connection within for self-responsibility? How does your funk typically play out?