Free Will = Self-Responsible

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.  It was 6am.  I rolled out, trudged down the stairs, and started making espresso.  I’d had a rough night of restless legs and a restless mind, which had me falling asleep somewhere between one and two in the morning.  I wasn’t happy.  In that moment, a strong latte was my only hope.

Espresso made.  Trudged back up the stairs and into my office, where I flopped down and put my attention on my next priority, my gratitude journal.  Each morning, I write down three things I’m currently grateful for and then focus on them for a few minutes.  Today, this was the last thing I felt like doing but, like magic, three things appeared from the tip of my pen looking like this:

Grateful for:

  1. Meditation

  2. My Free Will

  3. Love in my Life

“My Free Will.”   A little reminder that I am responsible for my actions and my attitude, especially when I’m feeling like a sleepless grumpy-butt.

My commitment (to myself) to get up at 6am came directly out of “My Free Will” to start my day with some self-care (Let’s have a little self-accountability here, Karen!🙂).

 No one is making me get up at 6am.  I am choosing to do so.

So, more often than I like, I have sleepless nights.  I can’t control those nights.  What I can control is how I’m going to respond to a sleepless night.  I can react and take my victimhood out on others…essentially punishing them for my circumstances.  Or I can take accountability for and be responsible for my attitude and behavior and not make others responsible for my tired grumpy-butt.

I try to start my day on the right foot and yes, that includes choosing to participate in a caffeine addiction🙂.  It also includes gratitude journaling, meditating, stretching, writing, and connecting with myself.  This reminds me why I chose to start waking up earlier…to have the time to start my day in self-care so that I choose me first and don’t make you responsible for my attitude, my lack of sleep, my circumstances.

I can choose to remain a victim to last night and allow it to continue victimizing my day and this moment.  Or I can choose to find joy, grace and happiness right here.

I can choose to be grateful that I was gifted a restless night of sleep, in a safe home and a comfortable bed, with love surrounding me, and the universe supporting me.

Thankfully today, I choose the latter.  I fully understand that I am responsible to choose to BE my best self.  “My Free Will” gives me that choice.  Your Free Will gives you the same.

And then tonight, I’ll sleep like a baby (You hear me, Universe?!?) and be curious about what tomorrow will bring.  I’ll attempt to be Pope Francis-like and, “await the surprise of each new day.”


Self-exploration questions:

  • How do you get yourself out of a funk when it appears? How do you shift?  Do you find that you get wrapped up in mis-directed anger toward others?  Or do you find connection within for self-responsibility?  How does your funk typically play out?

Published by Karen Solt

I am an Emotional Wellness Coach, YouTuber, Blogger, and activist for peace, unity, freedom, equality and connection. I hold a Masters in Psychology (Counseling) and am passionate about helping others. A retired Navy Senior Chief veteran, I have had various life experiences that have created my unique style of coaching. I remain curious about the human experience and am beyond grateful for the life I share with my fabulous dog, Paco. You can learn more about me and my work at KarenSolt.com, https://www.youtube.com/c/KarenSolt, or you can reach me at Karen@KarenSolt.com.

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